"INFERTILITY" ART

This is a piece I did this week.

The piece speaks for itself.

I also did a fun duck! 

Both used what my little inner children have named 

the "Scribble till you Dribble" method!

What I am about to post gives Dina Wakley the credit for getting me here.  She is a master at what she does and without her, I would not have discovered what I have about where I can explore with my own art styles.

It is interesting, in my last post I was so sure I had found "my place, my calling, my style."

 I started with The Dina Wakley Style and then, as seems to happen when one "copies" another in any way whatsoever, it stopped working for me the next day!  

 G-D Speed

So I had to keep working and drawing and looking and seeing and feeling and exploring.

What I discovered.

I can not color the image (as Dina does) and see ANYTHING! (as in seeing forms in the clouds.

I can not keep my eyes open and let my hand wander, (as I was taught) I have to CLOSE my eyes and go right to my inner most being FIRST, then with my eyes CLOSED, start "Scribbling till I Dribble."

What I mean by the "Dribble" is listening intently to my little children inside.

They tell me "enough!"

We are done.

I don't paint my art (as Dina does and as I was taught, before I look.)  This made me a bit crazy and confused and I was going against my grain and working completely from my head.  I just seemed to SHIFT from my gizzards to my brain automatically when I started to paint my scribble....so I don't....

I WALK AWAY. 

IMPERATIVE.

If I look at my scribble right away, I feel my impatience come up big time.

This impairs my art.

It brings up all kinds of things like:

Failure

Can't do it

I'm not really an artist

Why didn't I stay in Law School

I really should be officiating weddings and funerals

AND NONE OF THIS WORKS

BECAUSE IT ISN'T THE REAL ME

anymore.

When I come back to my picture, I stand about ten feet away and put it on a solid background.

OH! (also a departure from Dina) I use a SU water soluble pastel rather than a   water soluble pencil.

I need heavy black marks.

?

I look and look away.

I come back and rotate the pic.

If my mind wanders, I shelve it (like in therapy or meditation.)

I come back again and rotate it.

And

I come back again and it is back where it started.

Then I come up close and look on the diagonals.

This is how I found this picture.

It jumped right out oat me.

INFERTILITY.

I saw two beings fertile and one not.

I saw a goddess on the far right.

I saw twins in the being on the left, one being in the middle and a void on the right.

The Goddess was safety.

DUCK and baby duck FOR FUN!

This was a "snap" to see

in my "LITTLE CHILDREN ART CLOUDS!"

I paint, I use tombows, I use mists, I use pastels, I use crayons.
I fingerpaint, I use household goodies, I use proper stencils, I use lace as stencils.
I hate what I create and cover it up and finger paint over it in white gesso or black gesso.
I buy the cheapest products available.
I boycott liquitex and all the expensive products.
I shop at Hardware stores for most of my products, mediums and the dollar store for my paints.

I AM ON A BOYCOTT TO NOT MAKE THIS CRAFT CLASSIST
 I'm a really poor people mommy artist.
and I know there are LOTS of us out there.
Too many crafts (music lessons etc.) I find are CLASSIST and not using a sliding scale of ANY sort.
You can tell I am passionate about this!

because liquitex, neo, dylan, ranger, Caran D'Ache, Dewent, Kohl Noor etc. (though you will see and the rest of the typically names products are do damn expensive!
I do buy only some of these products but very infrequently.
My friend Roben-Marie has always given me great alternatives for expensive products and links to get them as well as her original products.

My new friend Tam, from Willowing, also recognizes that not all people can afford all the expensive workshops out there but would love to take them and as are entitled as everyone else who CAN afford them.  She accommodates this.  She is an AMAZING artist!!!

And I am sure there are many other artists who will accommodate, if we ask.  I only know my OWN experience of asking and not being met by many many workshops I would have loved to take (asking for payment plans only!)  GRRR.  Oh well, in my next life maybe.

on that very strong note


Finding Zen in the Pen
Samara

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